I've got to confess something to you guys - I have delved into the world of online dating. I'm taking it seriously too. There are so many reasons behind it, but I think the simplest of those is the fact that I just don't meet very many new people. Of those I do meet, only a small portion of those are guys, and of those, an even smaller portion are single. I needed a bigger pond from which to fish. Building a profile on a trusted site was easy and made me take a step of my ever-narrowing comfort zone.
This whole online dating thing is kinda crazy. At first, I was super overwhelmed. THERE ARE SO MANY GUYS! AND THEY ARE ALL SINGLE! You have to sift through so much information looking for a suitable match. (By the way, people really put a lot of information in their little profiles - but that is totally helpful. You find out a lot of stuff and get a feeling for their personality.)
Once you have somehow located someone you are remotely interested in, you send them a message. Then you wait. If you're lucky, you may get a message back. Then whole back and forth communication starts and you're trying to be the best version of yourself, but somehow you find your dorky little habits creeping in. And if you're super lucky, you might actually get a date.
There are plenty of downsides though. See the thing is, you can see people who view your profile. So, these are guys who looked at the pictures you've painstakingly cropped and the answers to questions you spent an afternoon pouring over, choosing just the right words and decided, "Nah." I'm okay with it, but I'd rather not even see that part. I don't really need to know that. I really could go the rest of my life and not see who's 'viewed me.' Truly.
What's even worse than that is when someone blocks you and you haven't even spoken to them. So, not only can I see that you have viewed me, but then it's followed up by a block. A definitive statement that says, "I no likey you." They could simply just overlook me, but they wanted to make sure I was out of their match zone. Harsh. In the end, I don't really care, because they are clearly not the person I'm supposed to end up with, but it is a little shock to the ego, you know?
Then there are those guys you see and think, "WOWZA, he's great!," and send a message, but that message never gets answered. Or you're talking to someone and then the messages just stop - after which you're left to contemplate where exactly you went wrong. An internal conversation like this usually happens after: 'What did I say? Was it my extended speech on the quality of programs on PBS and AMC? Or maybe it was my habit of using already overused catch-phrases? I would ask, but we all know I'm not going to do that. Blerg.'
Even with all those negatives, online dating simplifies everything in general. You don't have to ask yourself if someone you just met thinks you're dateable. If someone is interested, it's uncomplicated: he just send me a little message. If he doesn't, at least I haven't spent countless hours of my life (and my friend's lives, recounting stories to them) wondering if he 'like likes' me. It's non-confrontational, informal and laid back. I kind like/love it.
Also, I'm sure it's going to give me great stories for the blog. You're welcome in advance.
~j
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