Theories on Why I Don't Get Asked on Dates

(Ed's Note: I have gotten asked out occasionally, so please do not feel that sorry for me.  I am not a cat lady...yet.)

I would like to think that I'm a pretty pleasant person, for the most part.  I smile, tip decently, talk to strangers (the non-creepy ones, obvs), can be charming and am generally upbeat.  If I like a guy and he seems interested, and he says something like, "Going to [insert hipstery locale/artsy event/baseball game here] is lots of fun," I respond with, "Oh, yeah, that does sound like fun!"  And I wait....and wait...and wait, but the invitation never comes.  Huh.  Dating - I'm not doing it right.

So, what am I doing wrong here?  I am agreeable to an outing and all signs point to this person being interested romantically, yet nothing happens. 

Contemplating my dateless lead to going through all the phases of fixation:
1. Denying there is a problem
2. Blaming him because he's a boy and, therefore, a dumdum
3. Could it be me? Was I too over-eager?  Was I not eager enough?
4. I hate the word eager; it just sounds questionable
5. It's definitely me
6. Should I just ask him to do something?  Is that emasculating or feminist?
7. *Heartburn*
8. WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME??
9. *Diet Pepsi coma/Real Housewives marathon*

I was delving into the abyss of self-loathing when a miraculous thing happened.

Another single lady I know told me she was having the same problem, in fact, many of her friends were.  Aha!  I'm not alone!  I heard stories of women having intense phone conversations, emails, texts and/or Facebook friendships in which a date never materialized.  I know what you're thinking, "maybe that guy just wasn't that into you*."  Rest assured in many of these instances that was not the case.  Some of these guys who had been pursuing us had been pretty vocal about their intentions and still didn't ask us out.  How is this possible?

I've come to the conclusion that I'm not as obvious as I think I am.  I don't want to play all fast and loose (duh), but putting a little emphasis on wanting to see someone won't kill me.  I need to be more vocal about my attraction to the potential date, without being too, how do I say this delicately?, sluttastic.  Maybe this will give the suitor that little extra confidence he needs to ask me to dinner!

If that's not the reason I'm not getting asked on dates, there are a few alternate ideas I have come up with:
A.  I am so overwhelmingly beautiful that dudes are too scared to ask  (Probability: 1 in 10,000)
B.  I smell like a Deadliest Catch cast member (Typical Probability: 1 in 250,000, Probability after a run: 1 in 25)
C. Every man I meet is gay. (Probability: 1 in 3,000)
D.  I could just come off as a mega jerk and guys don't want to ask because they're afraid they'll hear some sarcastic comment and then get blown off.  (Probability: 1 in 10)
E.  Who knows?  Men are complicated creatures and I will never know why they do what they do, even if I get blessed with a son. (Probability: 1 in 2)

~J