Getting Whistled At and Other Perils of Being Me

I'm not sure if it's my personality or the fact I have a friendly face or possibly because I humor them, but weird people flock to me.  It's been this way my entire life.  This has gotten me into some awkward, strange and interesting situations over the years.  Odd men have given me some of the best stories ever.  Here are a few strange things that have happened to me in the past month:

• I went to a gas station to by a drink and while I was checking out, the clerk told me I had nice hair and then reached out and touched it and then smelled his hand. Diet Pepsi, I love you, but you are totally not worth hair molestation.
• During a late night stop at Jack In The Box, the cashier told me that he liked my face.  "Well, that's nice," I thought, until he told me I looked like his ex-girlfriend who had put a restraining order out on him.  I did not eat the Breakfast Jack that I ordered from him.
• While at the salon, a man asked me if my hair was my hair.  After I responded with an affirmative, he told me that people pay a LOT of money for hair like mine and started staring menacingly toward my head.  When I left, I literally ran to my car and sped off in case a scalping was imminent.
• I left my phone inside a bowling alley and went back in to retrieve it.  Before I could take 2 steps in, a server was racing toward me at full speed with my phone in his hand.  That wouldn't be so weird, but my sister and cousin had named him "Stranger Danger" because he had been staring at me for the better part of the night.  I had my cousin give him my number, natch.
• At a patio-type place with my friends and random guy came up and asked me if I was a lesbian.  (Sidenote: What a great question to lead with!  I'm going to try that sometime.)  I replied that I wasn't and smiled kindly, politely talked to him for a few minutes and turned away.  He proceed to bite my butt. Yeah, I said it. It was a little funny, but mostly strange.  He also sorta put me in a headlock.  Quality.
• After going on a few sorta dates with a guy, he told me I should follow him on Twitter.  Like any good girl, I went through a bunch of his Tweets.  Interestingly enough, he bragged about having slept with a stripper in the same week as our first interaction.  I no longer follow him.
• A certain friend of a friend sniffs my hair when he goes in for the causal "hi" hug. *Shudder*

These things make me wonder if this is all that is left out there.  Is this what a single girl has to choose from these days?  Hair sniffers, psychos and weirdos?  There has to be some normal-ish guy out there that won't sniff my hair until I want him to - which I won't.  I guess I just need to be patient until he shows up somewhere random, like a Five Guys or in line at Discount Tire.  In the meantime, I am going to bide my time by writing poems about Twix PB bars and sending tweets to famous people.      

Happy Monday!
J