Ah, the Bachelorette is back. What a premise this show has. Let's be honest, who wouldn't want 25 handsome men who intend to date/marry you arriving at your doorstep? That sounds like a fun time to me. Really - it takes all the work out of the whole dating thing. Someone went out, interviewed a crap ton of dudes, weeded all the candidates down and sent them directly to you. Hel-lo!
Except that doesn't happen in real life. Real life means you have to wade through all the bad ones to find the one good one, without the help of a producer. There will never be, at any point in my life, 25 guys (or even 5 guys) vying for my attention. I won't be whisked away to a tropical location for a few dates. No one is going to propose to me because I chose them over another guy, after dating, then dumping two dozen men over the course of a few weeks.
The thing is that watching this show puts me in a frame of mind that creates these totally unrealistic expectations of how love goes and/or grows. The show creates situations in which people force themselves to feel something for the other person. They convince themselves they are falling in love, or something like it, something close to it. This spells disaster, not only for them, but for the viewer too. We begin to look at our own love life and think, "Um, I'm on my 4th date with this person and I like them, but should I be feeling something more?" Love should grow in time, shouldn't it? It isn't always fireworks right away. It's bigger than that. Love should be more than that.
(To be fair, I've been in a situation where I felt completely connected with someone right away and there is something to be said for that overwhelming feeling of "Gah! This person is Just. So. Amazing!" It's really great, that feeling.)
If I'm honest, I would be such an egomaniac if I was the Bachelorette. "Look at me, being perused by all these super-hot dudes! Oh, you're just watching TV? Check it out - now I'm taking a helicopter ride over the Alps! What are you doing? Oh, just working and doing laundry? Oh. Well, that's...cool." I would be a jerk. No one would like me. I would be Brad. No one likes Brad.
But it would be a nice change to see some average, normal person be the Bachelor/Bachelorette. When was the last time you saw a homely Bachelorette? Never. As I told someone the other day, I don't hide what I have NOT going for me. At this point, you see what you're getting yourself into. There isn't going to be some surprise when you come over and notice all my giggly bits because I'm Spanx-less. You won't gasp because I forgot to put on fake eyelashes or undereye concealer and I have a gnarly zit making itself at home on my chin. You see me for me - not me under the best of conditions.
Maybe that's where the show misses the mark. The people don't get to see each other in all circumstances, but only in the best locales, with full hair/make-up and perfect lighting. Maybe Chris Harrison and company should have the season at regular house, with regular, not-so-beautiful people and the dates should be, like, to the movies or Chili's. Now that, I would watch.
I can fall in love with ANYONE in Fiji, with my own butler, and a bottle of champagne. I personally think that they should have a show where the contestants go on horrendous dates. Like babysitting sextuplets with colic, and diarrhea while the parents get a break. Or have to muck out the stalls of an animal they are eating for dinner, and then "fully" prepare dinner. Anyone that can go through that and still be cordial to one another, let alone still want them in the same room has a chance at being in a relationship. Plus it would just be entertaining to watch!
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