I'm good at giving advice. I won't say that I'm usually right, but I'm usually right. But, in fairness, it's totally easily to fix other people's problem, isn't it? You have distance, aren't emotionally involved and can categorically say what you think without hesitation. I caution friends to take their time getting serious, to stop fixating on what isn't a problem, to let things run their course, to be themselves. I have clarity with their issues. But my own dilemmas? Not so much.
One of my best friends told me that I wasn't going to be happy with the kind of guy that I'm looking for. He went on to say that I'm always interested in really conservative guys and those guys aren't interested in me, because I'm not so conservative and I wouldn't be happy with them in the long run. Whoa. Could it be true? I am sabotaging myself?
Now, I'm not a radical or anything, but I'm not uptight either. I like to be silly, have fun and not take things too seriously. Guys I usually end up dating are so buttoned up and stoic, they don't understand fun me. They're missing the best part of my personality - I'm upbeat and goofy, who could not love that, I ask you? (Answer: Many, many folks. Some people are just so touchy.)
My friend is right, but why couldn't I see that earlier? If I was looking at someone else in my position, I would tell her to wait and the right person, who not only gets her quirkiness and flair but appreciates it, will come along. You shouldn't have to fit in a box, meet certain requirements or fill in enough boxes on a checklist to make someone like you, they should like you because you are you. <- Saying that is easy, learning that is the hard part.
You've helped me in times like this. I think you're right. (and yes Jeana, most times out of none, you are right) You just gotta wait. Things happen for a reason. <3 u Jeana.
ReplyDeleteDennis, you are a doll!
Deletehmm...kind of sort of news to me. i always saw you as quirky and fun. and *ahem*..not so much. your blog was based on a stereotype of a professional wasn't it? "buttoned up and stoic". calm, assertive when things are rough and bothersome. Mainly in the workplace but you know what i mean. i feel like you see a few different types of guys your interested in. In some, you see a concervative person and then you later figure out they're really not for you because they don't get you. Others, you might find later will be too quirky for you. i think there are multiple kinds of professionals that you have attracted or have been attracted to but only one that would suit you G!..There is the "Dork": act professional at work and not in social situations. "geeks": don't talk to pretty much anyone and stick with their own species, then you have the professional butterfly. somewhat of a social butterfly but social at the same time. a professinal in work situations but also able to carry on a concervative conversation with anyone at anytime..what you need my dear is a social butterfly on redbull! someone who can keep up with you. i've seen the way you are when your up here and when your really just down there. that way you guys can both be like moths by a lightbullb for a minute and then chillin like a snail on a shoe the next. get my drift? so do what you do and wait for the right one b/c. well, that's all you can do. that and keep hope alive and be yourself of course! you crazy Cat! peace!
ReplyDeleteWhew, that was a lot bro! Thanks for the encouragement :)
DeleteI think this is a more common predicament than you might have imagined. A lot of us spend time waiting/looking for the person who suits who we want to be or think we should be instead of who we really are. That's why real love is so frequently a surprise. Speaking as someone who spent ten years knowing her husband before realizing he was a perfect fit, I think you've hit on a goldmine here. :)
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